Dating Mrs. Palmer

I have a few loyal readers to my blog, one of those is my mother.  So mom, consider yourself warned.  This is a post you may want to skip.

So, my lovely wife and I have noticed a trend going on in the house lately.  For some reason, my 8 year old son, is all of the sudden, taking really long showers.  I know what your thinking, we thought it to.  But we would just poke our head in and ask

“Have you washed your hair?”

“No”

“Have you washed your body?”

“No”

“Well, quit playing with it and get washed up.”

I was joking, sort of.  But after this happened more than a few times, I decided we needed to have a chit-chat.  So I asked him before putting him to bed.

“What are you doing in the shower for so long?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you playing with yourself?”

He puts his head down and says “Yes.”

Seriously?  Already?  I mean, I know at this age, you touch it and grab it, but is he old enough to actually play with it that long?  I have no idea what age I was when I started spending that much time “pleasuring myself.”  I know once it starts, it never stops but I have no idea how young you are when you start.

“Everybody does it buddy, but you need to do that in the privacy of your bedroom.  We have to pay a water bill and you standing in there for an hour isn’t helping any, plus other people use that shower, ok?”

“Ok.”

“And make sure you clean up after yourself.”

“Ok.”

Yep, he’s a chip off the old block.  Was this supposed to be a conversation that I was supposed to have with my father?  Or did I overstep by talking to him about it?  I’m very open with my kids, if they have questions, I’ll get them answers.  I would rather them come to me with questions rather than talking to someone else.  I hope they continue that practice all the way through school and into adulthood.  My father passed when I was 8, so I didn’t have that male figure in the household to ask or ask me about these kinds of questions.  I sure wasn’t going to ask my mom, ewww!  Besides, she bought me one of those books about puberty.  Of course, I just spanked it to the nude drawings of the woman.

I don’t see how it’s productive to tell him not to do it.  Sure, tell him not to do it in public, but he isn’t hurting anything.  Unless he strokes too hard, but then it’s his own fault anyways.  Although, he uses both hands in sports.  He may not be able to switch hands for some strange.  Poor kid!  We all have our crosses to bare.

I’ll be glad when he’s old enough to really keep it hidden.  Do I have to teach him to use a sock or is that something he learns on his own?  I never used one but to each his own.

 

I am participating in the Dude Write Starting Lineup this week where you can find some excellent posts by bloggers who happen to be dudes that masturbate.  Stop by, read them all and vote for me and 2 others.